The items are left to the devil who might have gone with the bride, had she picked them up. After this all the wedding preparations actually start. Next the wedding banns are read in the church on three consecutive Sundays just some weeks before the wedding. There are many such traditions like this which are not carried out today.
Relatives and friends attending the function apply the roas to the bridal couple which symbolizes purification and signals the end of spinsterhood and bachelorhood. Legend has it that this ceremony is meant to bid farewell to single life and is probably used for purification. Here the bride and the groom, each at their respective residences are required to bathe in coconut water. When all the juice is over, the woman who had ground it gets the money. The bangles are made of glass and very delicate. The ros is a ritual where the bride is ceremoniously massaged with coconut juice. She should leave it in the wash bucket with a currency note tied to the skirt. Also, the bride receives gifts from relatives and wears the ceremonial bangles, eight to nine in number on her right wrist and seven to eight on her left. Thus they should not be broken and the bride is not expected to do any work due to this. I for one who had been brought up in more liberal environs had thrown all tradition to the wind. Next the wedding banns are read in the church on three consecutive Sundays just some weeks before the wedding. And finally, D-day arrived. This informs the public of the impending marriage and they can bring out the objections if any. We did not have any formal engagement, but yes my prospective husband came to be known as my fiance from the day we got our stamp of approval from our parents. Music rent the air, food, drink and merriment was the order of the day. Prayers are recited or sung, an example of the Tedeao. A sweet made of wheat and sugar cooked in coconut juice known as 'soji' and another made of gram dal, coconut juice and jaggery known as 'Vonn' is also served. There are many traditional customs that take place in the span of these 4 to 5 days, they might be small traditions but they are critical because they have a big meaning to them. Within a period of three weeks thereafter the public can raise and submit objections if any, as the Registrar affixes a notice on the board inviting them to do so. Funny as it may seem, one could not see any beggars around but nonetheless it was called the same. Relatives take the opportunity and get some bangles for themselves as well. It is customary for the son-in-law and his friends to lift off any item that they like, provided it is small enough not to be noticed. The saddo or the dress to be worn on the first night should not be washed by the bride. There's coconut cake and tea to go around for everybody. I jumped at the prospect of marrying a long- time friend but was not sure how to respond.
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